It was a saturday evening and they were bored. Bored of the usual routines of weekdays and weekends. She wanted to try out something new.. do something that they didn't do often.. something outdoor-sy. He wanted to do something spontaneous.

They decided to meet the following morning. He was to pick her up from her place. They had no idea what they were going to do.

He picked her up as decided and stopped the bike a few miles away while they thought about where to go. The weather was amazing and too good to waste indoors. They were all in for some physical activity, and also something not too fancy. Exploring the city and visiting old monuments had always been a long-postponed-thing they wanted to do together. After five minutes and some quick decisions, they found themselves heading towards Golconda fort.. he hadn't been there since he was a kid and she always had an interest for places of historical importance..

A long, lovely drive later.. they reached their destination. The lovely aroma of corn-cobs roasted on coal (or charcoal.. whatever) greeted them and they had to have some to complement the weather. It felt simply amazing. As they entered the fort along with the other average sunday sight-seers, they could almost sense the long lost grandeur and magical old times associated with the fort's boundary walls.

They decided on not engaging a guide, but exploring the fort themselves. They bought a small book about the place that was also a map which told them that the place was almost a 1000 years old.. They were amazed at the architecture and the sheer intelligence and craftsmanship of the people those days. They talked about how it was a shame that all that wisdom was never passed down to future generations.

As they steadily climbed up the hill through the fort, they marveled at almost everything that met their sight. She was lost imagining how the kings and queens of yore would have lived.. and who might have walked those very pathways just a several hundred years ago. He was busy figuring out how the fort must have been planned, where the secret passageways could have been and how the water storage and circulation system was planned. They shared their thoughts and had a great time reaching the very top of the fort where there was a small temple.. and then a biradari where the king would come up for a view of the country side. They climbed to the top of the biradari and stood at a window looking down on the entire city.. and how beautiful it was from up there, with the cool breeze blowing.. they could almost here the king's musicians playing old sufi music on a lazy sunday afternoon....

They started their walk down-hill in high spirits.. She made up a story about their unrequited-love of a thousand years ago.. how she was a beautiful arabian princess who visited this fort with her father, and he was a tax-minister at the fort and the only person who did not look up to admire her beauty.. eventually they fell in love and were imprisoned for life, as the world did not understand their love. He looked at her seriously and said that to him she is an arabian princess right now. It was cheesy, but it made her feel good. They held hands and went skipping down the stone steps. She slipped once and sat hard on her bottom and they had a good laugh.

They were now entering the area where the king and queen's bedrooms were built and on the way they found a place that looked like an ancient courtyard.. rectangular, with beautiful arches in the walls and stone steps along the sides. It was empty and she suggested they rest there for a while to get away from the crowd and catch their breath as well. He agreed.

They went in and sat on the steps, drank some water and talked about the fort for a while. He asked her if she liked this place, and she said that she did, very much. Then from nowhere, he whipped out a pen and a notepad and said that he wanted help in putting on paper all the things that he felt for her, all the stuff that he had difficulty, or did not know how to express. She said that she would be glad to help him and suggested that he could start of by listing some of her qualities that he liked a lot. He went on to list a page full of nice words like caring, loving, understanding.. and so on. She stopped him and asked what all these words meant as they were general words used on any person. He then took the time to explain how he saw each of those qualities in her and how he felt that he was incredibly lucky to have her in his life. He went on speaking until she realised how well he understood her and there were tears in her eyes. There were some people coming and going in to the courtyard, but time seemed to have stood still as they were lost in their own happy world.

He said that having said all this, he had something to give her. He took out a small green box from his pocket, held it before her and asked her to open it. She felt excited as she opened the box. To her surprise, she found a long red string in there. It was confusing.. what was he trying to give her? He smiled, tied the string around her left ring finger, and held the other end in his hand. He asked her to close her eyes and try to feel through the string what he felt for her. She did feel an incredible bond and a close connection between them. Then he asked her to open her eyes and look up at the pretty clouds.. as she was doing that, she felt something slide through the string and onto her finger. She looked down and saw a diamond ring glittering on her finger. She looked at him in shock and surprise and he asked her if she would marry him. She was speechless for a minute and then she said yes. It was the happiest moment of their lives. They were so happy that they dint even think to hug each other. It was just so happy.

She had realized that the one person who understood her better than anyone else was asking her to be his wife. What more could she ever ever want. He was saying something about the significance of the ring and the diamonds and what he would like her to think every time she looked at the ring.. but she wasn't listening too well. She was so overwhelmingly happy.

After a while and some more talking, they decided it was time to leave. As they got up, she asked him why he chose this place. He said it was so full of rich stories and he wanted their own story to be linked with something that was etched in history and time. She asked him where he got the idea of the string and all. He said he saw it in a movie and liked it a lot.

She thought it was cheesy.. But it made her feel awesome. :-)

long time..

i read in todays paper that a blog is now considered a type of resume.. that recuriters and employers actually search online for prospective employees, their blogs, etc etc.. so the article went on to mention that we must be careful with our blog posts, think about entries.. make them reflect the best, most positive (and non-existant) skills of ours.. and never never divulge our true feelings, inner thoughts.. (basically the thougts that make us look weird)..

typical.. this world is so artificial. i thought that blogging was the one medium that u can use to vent out all those feelings and thoughts and the crazy stuff never shared before.. i thought its the one place where you can take off that out-wordly mask and be yourself.. but no.. the world has to take that too and turn it into some sort of parameter of judgement in this meaningless rat race..

now people will start making blogs not out of the love of blogging or writing but just to fill in posts and posts about their achievements and how great they are.

this world is too artificial for me to handle.

I've always been a plain-jane girl-next-door kind of person...

all through life i kept wondering at what point do i stop being a person and start being a girl.... i mean.. i know what it is like to be a girl.. but to actually feel like one.. its a different thing.. and i never did.. (dont get me wrong this is not going to turn into a confession of something else lol!!)..

sometimes i wondered.. does it take a man in ur life to really make you feel all girly? well.. that's not entirely true i guess.. there are so many single women who seem so in tune with their feminity.. what is it then that distinguishes the average 'homely' women from the sensuous, sexy women that the whole world is crazy about...

is it good looks? is it being attractive, or 'well endowed' (keke..) or tall, or graceful, or having great features, or style? why is it that some women are able to do so well.. and some women are .. well... feministically-challenged??

i think i actually, really know the answer to that one.. honestly, truly.. but i dont want to face it.. i dont want to really acknowledge it.. so i keep pretending i dont know what it is....

it's what every girl who doesn't seem to care much about looks says.. 'i dont really care.. its too shallow.. i would like to be beyond mere looks.. true beauty is on the inside not outside.. etc etc..' i know.. ive given these speeches to myself loads of times.. and hey i do believe it too.. true beauty is definitely about what's inside.. and there's a lot of women who do deep and meaningful things in their lives that even justifies what they say about looks...

i guess the point im trying to make here is.. are the women of my type really justified in saying that being interested in looking good is shallow? i for one can understand that maintaining looks is not an easy business at allll.. infact, its easier to pick up and memorize a dictionary in 3 months.. than to stay on a diet,keep your skin shining, keep your hair flowing, the perfect figure the perfect clothes.. and shoes.. its real hard work.. so.. what's really wrong if that's who you choose to be.. what's so shallow about it?

i guess its only wrong when u start harming your body and your mind in a quest to look good.. which i guess is done even otherwise by other women who 'dont care' by eating and sitting around all day doing other important stuff..

so.. ive always been the plain-jane kind of girl.. the girl who never cared about looks and therefore let her looks disappear into some neverland so far far away that she doesn't know if she can ever have them again.. why does it matter? because it does.. because i think deep down inside, sub-consiously, no matter how much denied, women still do deeply care about how they look. every woman wants to have skinny thighs and great skin and an ocassional glance of admiration... atleast every woman that i have met or heard of..

i've come to realise that.. when women like me realize they can never be 'that' good-looking.. they kind of give up and resort to the 'i think beauty is over-rated' line.. kind of like stay in that safety-net-zone area...

i've also come to realize that.. (with a little help ofcourse).. that just because you cant be 'that' good looking, its no reason to completely give up on yourself and your body.. because.. however you are, your body needs you.. and the woman inside needs you too.. and truly, women love feeling pampered.. with good clothes.. with shoes, accessories, a healthy body, massages, facials.. what not..

i've definitely come to realise that.. just because i dont look like the girl on the poster.. it doesnt mean i should deny myself the right to feel sensual from inside.. and there is no rule that i need to look like the girl on the poster to be able to feel sensual at all..

feeling like a woman has nothing to do with the way a person looks.. nothing to do with what others think of you.. and nothing to do with how the world sees you.. and is not related to whether there's a man in your life or not..

feeling like a woman is about doing things like a woman.. embracing the feminine side of you.. letting yourself get the occasional pampering.. enjoying a thing or two girly-style.. taking a break from trying to succeed in a man's world.. and actually remembering to be a woman..

i wish i had realised these things earlier.. and not wasted some precious years of my youth.. but i guess better late than never..

there are still somethings that i am severely handicapped at.. like picking out good clothes and shoes and bags.. im also fasionistically-challenged..

but i can work on the things that i can do.. and i will do...

im not sure if i can change the way i look from outside, but i can definitely change the way i feel from inside... that is in my control.. and will be in my control forever..

i've got a lot of thinking and planning to do.. (im so excited! i love doing that)... i guess i will keep posting more stuff here as i go forward... hopefully it will work out great...

I hate summer

I cant believe i loved summer when i was a kid.

I was a weird kid. All kids are werid.

Once there were no other kids in the park and i was swinging all by myself for 2 hours straight in the afternoon in the middle of the desert-summer. I was looking at the sun all the time.. trying to make shapes in the bright sunlight each time i opened my eyes.. I could see swords and horses and desert warriors.. i made up my own stories as i kept swinging. The next day i was sick with a sun stroke. I remember vividly smiling myself to sleep thinking about the warriors even as i was sick.

I was a weird kid. summer doesnt seem to affect kids at all. they have buffalo skin. the heat just doesnt get through.

i hate summer now. summer is especially unkind to girls. and specially specially unkind to girls like me with sensitive skin that gets tanned one shade darker every 5 minutes in the sun. its a ridiculous curse. i hate it.. well atleast i know that i have less risk of skin cancer or something.. whatever.. i feel like the kid in the commercial with the sun sucking from a straw at the top of his head... i feel exactly like that.

i want to sit in a tub full of ice cubes. i want to live in a refrigerator. i want to go to the north pole.. or south pole.. or wherever where there's ice. my brain refuses to work and my body refuses to move when its so hot.. i feel dull and sluggish and kind of stupid.. (or maybe that's just regular me.. i dunno :D) ..

yuck yuck yuck.

yuck yuck yuck yuck. stupid sticky summer. yuck yucky summer yuck.

Extroverts..Introverts

Okay..

Doesn't sound like an interesting topic? Good.. then ur probably an extrovert..

hehe.. just kidding..


So i've done some research in this subject.. and i have some findings.. and findings of any research are not meant to be kept to oneself.. but shared with others.. so here i go..


"An Extrovert is a person who is friendly and outgoing. An Introvert is a shy person. All introverts should strive to become extroverts. "


This, sadly, is what most people understand and believe to be true. It's not their fault. It's the way people are conditioned. Let me share some of my real findings...


Extrovert:

Is indeed a person who is friendly and outgoing. However, there's more to it than just that. The focus of energy for an extrovert is in the outside world, in other words, they are externally- focussed people, energized by being around other people.


Introvert:

An internally-focussed person who is energized by being alone and feels drained of energy by being around other people.



Shyness:

A state of a person characterized by nervousness, apprehension, self-consciousness and a lot of anxiety.



Fact: a shy person may be an introvert, but all introverts are not shy. as a matter of fact, introverts are also not arrogant as often thought to be.


Extrovert vs. Introvert:

1. Extroverts tend to fade when alone and can become bored when there are no people around. An extrovert will talk to someone rather than sit alone and think. Introverts are more concerned with their inner world. They love thinking and exploring their thoughts and feelings.

2. Extroverts tend to think as they speak and think better while they are talking, while introverts tend to think before they speak.

3. Extroverts enjoy social situations and seek them out since they love being around people. Introverts often avoid social events as being around people drains their energy, even if they have good social skills. After being with people for a long time, they need time alone to recharge.

4. Extroverts have several and a wide circle of friends. Introverts need and make friends too, but are very selective about it.

5. Extroverts appear to be more socially skilled compared to introverts. However, introverts exhibit very little difficulty in speaking to known/unknown people when it comes to concepts and issues.


Point to note:

When introverts want to be alone, it is not, by itself, a sign of depression. It means that they either need to regain their energy from being around people or that they simply want the time to be with their own thoughts. Being with people, even people they like and are comfortable with, can prevent them from their desire to be quietly introspective. Being introspective, though, does not mean that an introvert never has conversations. However, those conversations are generally about ideas and concepts, not about what they consider the trivial matters of social small talk.

Introverts make up about 60% of the gifted population but only about 25-40% of the general population.



The Problem:

Unfortunately, our society today, corporate and otherwise, considers the behaviour of an extrovert as the norm against which all other behaviour is measured. While in reality, extroverted behaviour is only a manifestation of the way an extrovert interacts with the world.

It might be a little harsh to say that this may be a form of unrecognized discrimination. However, a subtle discrimination against introverts certainly does exist.



Conclusion:

We must come to realize that introverts are not 'wrong' people, but just people. They come with their own set of talents and unique perspective, as a result of their intrinsic analysis. These talents are as needed as any others for the success of a project/organization. When forced to wear the 'mask of extroversion', they might be sub-consciously drained of their energy, thereby hindering their progress. Just like an extrovert would feel if confined and not allowed to interact with others.



Some famous introverts of our world: Steven Spielberg, Charles Darwin, Albert Einstein, Michael Jordon, Isaac Newton, Princess Diana.


resource:
http://giftedkids.about.com/od/glossary/g/extrovert.htm
http://giftedkids.about.com/od/glossary/g/introvert.htm